"Here are some of the lessons that children have learnt from an early age:

When your Mom is mad, don't let her brush your hair.

If your brother hits you, don't hit him back - the second person is always caught.

You can't trust dogs to mind your food.

Never hold a vacuum cleaner near the bird cage.

Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.

You can't hide a brussel sprout in a glass of juice.

When you're sad tell Grandpa, he will pay you to be happy.

You won't get your questions answered until you're really old.

And here are just a few of the lessons adults have learned, often the hard way!

Never ask a three year old to hold an egg.

Dealing with small children is like trying to juggle with spaghetti.

Raising teenagers is like trying to nail jelly to a tree.

Families are like chocolates - sometimes they contain nuts.

Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

Children, like laughter, help to keep you young.

Growing old is unavoidable, growing up isn't.

You still don't know all the answers!"

Erma Bombeck©